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WHEN THINGS HEAT UP...

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Advertising is a high pressure environment. Here is the Spanish technique to keep calm when things go crazy. It's a fan. This is completely real and not made up at all.*

Figure 1: Pre-Fan (aka your fan page)

Click here to print out your own Spanish stress-reducing fan (on 8.5 x 11).

Watch the instructions below for how to fold it:

Figure 2: Fanimation

Enjoy it and be cool. Always (almost always).

*Yes it is.

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DÍDIMA READS, AGAIN

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by linguistic enthusiast guest blogger Dan Ahern

Welcome back to another edition of Dídima Reads: An Audiobook Series.

As you'll recall from last time, it's accepted among the scientific community that listening to a European accent makes your life richer and more fulfilling. So what better way to take advantage of our wonderful Spaniard Dídima than having her record a delightful series of audiobooks? (That question is rhetorical, but if you were looking for the answer, it's "none.")

Presented for the imminent edification of your ears is today's audiobook:

But Not the Hippopotamus by Sandra Boynton

Download the audiobook here.

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DO IT FOR DIDIMA'S MOM

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She's been praying for this.

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SSSHHH...

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It's time to open my folder of secret recipes.

I will start with my most precious one, my family's secret sangria recipe.

Jajaja (hahaha) you wish. I will have a special clause in the contract with the nice agency that sponsors my visa. You could say that I am crazy (my mom is already crying) but I will do it. I will share and I will prepare it!

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MADE IN SPAIN, IMPROVED THE USA

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Spain is well know all around the world for its famous inventions. Centuries of history of amazing inventions that made people's lives easier (easier is a good generic adjective). United Sates would not be the same without some of them, and that includes ad agencies.

Today let's talk about the sublime Spaniard invention "La macarena". Who in the world never danced "La macarena" (translation: mother of god), a genuine dance/song/show created by two brothers called "Los del Rio" (translation: The Ones from the River) from "Dos Hermanas" (translation: Two Sister).

Macarena is based in a real story. It started when Macarena was upset when her boyfriend Vitorino joined the army. And to make her feel better about herself she spent the time going out on the town and carousing with other men. This smells like a hollywood drama movie or a soap opera.

And the chorus says something like "give your body joy, Macarena, your body is to give joy and good things."

Los del Rio were kind of a "one hit wonder" and they will never

make another one again. The song created in 1992 revolutionized the dance floor, cruise ships, wedding and OFFICE PARTIES with its 3 steps dance (maybe a couple more, but still the key was a couple steps that any person with a brain that worked and lacked rhythm can follow it). It was ranked the "#1 Greatest One-Hit Wonder of all Time" by VH1 in 2002. Wow! And it was made in Spain.

Why do you think he was so popular?

It's a great example of how something made in Spain that improved the USA. Have you thought how a Spanish art director can improve not just you agency, but your country! Maybe we can have one hit, but hopefully more.

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THE HOLIDAY BONUS: WIZARD KINGS DAY

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by Dídima and Dan

Welcome to The Holiday Bonus. People tend to view visas as a bit of a hassle, but they don't read the fine print on the forms. If they did, they'd see that hiring somebody from another culture (let's say, Spain, if we had throw one out there randomly) actually entitles them to many tangible benefits. Chief among them: acquiring holidays.

Besides getting that awesome person to work for you, you also get the rights to their nation's holidays. And that can only mean one thing: holiday parties.

For this edition of The Holiday Bonus, we'll explore Spain's take on celebrating Jesus: Wizard Kings Day.

Sketch courtesy of Dídima. Click to see it larger.

Let's start with the basics. El Dia de los Reyes Magos (Wizard Kings Day) is celebrated January 6th. It marks the occasion that the three Magi brought some presents to Lil' J in the manger. (Magi is probably a way more appropriate translation of 'Reyes Magos', but Wizard Kings is what Dídima says, and you have to admit it sounds 400% cooler.) Since the Magi were the most famous gift-givers, Spaniards in kind give gifts to each other for the holiday. Just like Christmas here, the tradition is that the Wizard Kings bring everybody presents overnight, and it's good form to leave them turrones (holiday sweets) to eat and milk for their camels. (Dídima's parents also left them some liquor. This makes sense when you think about who eats the cookies you left for Santa as a kid.) So basically, it's like how Christmas runs here, except our version is a fat man that lands flying reindeer on your roof and then trespasses his way down your chimney. Both are sort of creepy but at least you can figure out the origins of the Wizard King traditions.

So now the important question: How can we turn this into an office party?

The Costumes

You'll need 3 people to dress as the Wizard Kings themselves. They wear sweet robes, fanciful crowns, jewelry, etc. They're kings. These guys are the life of the party. In Spain, they have parades where the Wizard Kings and their entourages throw candy to the crowd. Basically you're a desert pimp slangin' Butterfingers to your people. Here's an actual parade King for reference:

Now, each Wizard King has their entourage too, so if you want, you can divide the office into allegiances for Baltasar (Balthasar), Melchor (Melchior) and Gaspar (Caspar/Gaspar/whatever). Here are the important parts of the entourage that you could dress as: soldiers, horses, camels, musicians (especially drummers), and, if you have a good insurance plan, fire slingers. Remember the whole birthplace-of-Christianity aesthetic, aka Holy Land circa 1 AD.

The Libations

There aren't really any specific drinks associated with this holiday, but seeing as it's a holiday, cava is always a good choice.

The Food

Roscón de Reyes.

It's sort of a pastry wheel with prizes baked inside. They don't really make them here, so just jam some trinkets into a cake and you're good to go. You can add a gambling element by having a certain prize in there that, for whoever finds it in their piece of cake, grants the "good" luck of getting to organize the party next year.

The Activities

Gift exchange: Optional, but a good way to recycle everything from the Christmas party gift exchange.

Throwing Candy: A Good Wizard king throws more sweet stuff than Roger Clemens during his best steroids years.

Music: Entourage musicians can improvise drums or other cheap instruments, but other than that Christmas music is still in fashion.

Holiday Bonus Bonus

Wizard Kings Day is the day after The King of Spain's birthday, so one of your principles could dress up as Juan Carlos I. He doesn't sling candy, but he does get a crown.

So that's Wizard Kings Day. Sounds pretty cool, right? That's just one sweet Spanish holiday you could be celebrating. If you're looking for talent, start thinking about how good you might look in some golden robes, tossing lollipops at people while a camel serves you cava.